Strengthening Soul Speak

Discouragement is a massive theme in the Scriptures. It is a massive theme in our lives as believers as well. I would like to set an example as a believer who struggles yet hopes in God. There was a combination during a recent worship service that was such an encouragement to me that I pass it along to you in the hopes that we might be encouraged in the Lord and seek to encourage those around us in the Lord. 

Enjoy!

Psalm 42 ESV

As a deer pants for flowing streams,

so pants my soul for you, O God.

My soul thirsts for God,

for the living God.

When shall I come and appear before God?

My tears have been my food

day and night,

while they say to me all the day long,

“Where is your God?”

These things I remember,

as I pour out my soul:

how I would go with the throng

and lead them in procession to the house of God

with glad shouts and songs of praise,

a multitude keeping festival.

Why are you cast down, O my soul,

and why are you in turmoil within me?

Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,

my salvation and my God.

My soul is cast down within me;

therefore I remember you

from the land of Jordan and of Hermon,

from Mount Mizar.

Deep calls to deep

at the roar of your waterfalls;

all your breakers and your waves

have gone over me.

By day the LORD commands his steadfast love,

and at night his song is with me,

a prayer to the God of my life.

I say to God, my rock:

“Why have you forgotten me?

Why do I go mourning

because of the oppression of the enemy?”

As with a deadly wound in my bones,

my adversaries taunt me,

while they say to me all the day long,

“Where is your God?”

Why are you cast down, O my soul,

and why are you in turmoil within me?

Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,

my salvation and my God.

Summer 2012

The Summer is quickly passing by and the Lord has shown himself to be our gracious Lord and Father by providing our every need and continuing to bless us and challenge us here in Louisville. The Summer months have been a welcome break from the school schedule. I have been working full time with Danny and the Serious Business crew, and I am finally starting to feel like I am getting a better grasp on this whole painting thing. I have a ton to learn and every area is in need of improvement, but lessons are getting cemented and muscles are developing memories. I am so very thankful for Danny and his willingness to take me on as an employee and show me the ropes!

We were able to get away for a nice trip North to catch up with family and friends in Minnesota. We finally got to meet little Owen, and get these three boy cousins together for a meet and greet. I'm quite certain they're scheming even now as to how they will overthrow the rule of their two older girl cousins. If the Lord is gracious to give us many years, I am certain family get-togethers will be marked with much laughter and competition. 

We got to Moose Lake in time to hear several very fresh stories of loss at the hands of the flooding that happened there. It was so good to see many of our friends and family! We thank God that he gives us his Spirit and unites us to a family that continues on even when we cease to hold a mailing address or position of employment there. We thank God for what he has done and is doing there in the people of Moose Lake Covenant.

I am taking the time to write this now because I just finished reading a heap of books for a Summer J-term class that starts in the morning entitled, Leadership and Family Ministry. The reading has been a helpful assignment causing me to revisit old thoughts and try on some new ones dealing with the important topic of the roles parents and churches play in discipling children and youth. Much of the reading put words, research, and biblical guidance to hunches and feelings I had lived with for quite a while when my life was youth ministry. There were several moments of deepened sorrow as my errors were multiplied and clarified, but also much clarity and rejoicing as I thought of a future church and future youth in a healthier ministry. Thanks be to God that our errors do not cripple his power, nor do they need to cripple us.

We had a family photo shoot yesterday, to capture this wonderful season of our lives. We had a great time with a gifted and gracious friend from church as we walked and played in the park. We're excited to see what the final project looks like. Here's a link to her "sneak peek". 

Bekah and Weston are wearing grooves in the floors as Weston guides his momma around the house as his own personal set of training wheels. He's crawling and should soon be walking! We're hoping sooner rather than later; momma has other things she'd like to do all day!

PRAY FOR US:

*Pray that God would bless Danny and his business. Pray that I would improve as a painter and that the guys we work with would come to a saving relationship with Christ.

*Pray for me and my siblings as we seek to be faithful parents and spouses. Pray that the glory of God and obedience to his Word would be the main concern in our families.

*Pray that the Lord would bless me in this class and that I would grow as a student and man of God.

May the Lord bless you as you think about the great lengths he went to rescue you from the dominion of darkness, and as you are reminded by the existence of this blog that you are precious to us!

I mentioned an attached sermon in the last post. ...it wasn't attached. Here it is!
Pastor Ryan in SBTS Chapel

Moods, Tubes, and Old Dudes

"Tychicus will tell you all about my activities. He is a beloved brother and faithful minister and fellow servant in the Lord. I have sent him to you for this very purpose, that you may know how we are and that he may encourage your hearts". Colossians 4:7-8 ESV

Tychicus keeps popping up in the Scriptures! It is becoming more and more clear that this man plays an incredibly important yet quiet part in the advance of the gospel. Acts, Ephesians, Colossians, 2 Timothy, and Titus all mention this man working with Paul and the New Testament church.

I must confess that I have undervalued Tychicus. But the Lord has has graciously called me out and revealed unbelief in a couple different ways this month. I hope the attached sermon is an encouragement to you as it was me.

Weston had tubes put in his ears this last week, and I don't think it could have gone any better! That boy has a strong mother, and he is practically unshakable! He was scheduled to have ear drops for 5 days after surgery, but it turned out that he is allergic to that particular medicine! We got a new prescription and now things look really good!

Bekah has been running kids to appointments and studying hard for her Seminary Wives classes. She has taken on several new challenges in the realm of "home making" that have been a really big blessing to us! She has really been enjoying the weather change that allows her to take the kids outside and wear shorts! I'm not sure which one she enjoys more!

Ella has been growing into her role as big sister. She's becoming more and more helpful with keeping Weston happy and taking care of her own needs. She loves being outside with her friends and hates when play time is over. She's getting better and better with her language and listening skills. She is a real blessing from the Lord.

Ella and I also got the chance to go and visit my friend from school in Henryville, Indiana, and see some of the tornado damage. It was an awesome reminder of the strength that exists that can quickly destroy. Cade and his church have been a major light to the hurting community. Keep them in your prayers!

I have been going to the weight room with a couple guys from church the last couple months and God has really blessed me with extra energy and happiness though this time of exercise. Unfortunately, a few days ago my body let me know that I did something I shouldn't have which resulted in a back spasm that put me in significant pain and stiffness. I saw a chiropractor the following Tuesday. After several adjustments I am now feeling much better. Things are still a bit stiff when I sit or sleep, but strength and mobility are improving every day.

We had an enjoyable visit from Andrea and Peter last weekend! We were blessed by their willingness to come all the way from MN/IN to spend some quality time with us. We had some really nice weather to get out and see some sights and an extended evening to spur one another on to love and good deeds.

Pray for us!

• Pray that God would continue to soften our hearts to the gospel. Pray that Bekah and I would be more obedient to Christ and more thankful for what has been done for us. Pray that Ella would grow in understanding and receptiveness to the Good News of Christ as we continue to share with her.
• Pray that Weston's tubes and helmet process continues. Pray that they would bring the appropriate relief and correction.
• Pray that Bekah would continue to find joy and peace in her incredibly important and difficult role in the home and with the children.
• Pray that my back continues to heal and get stronger than it was before.
• Pray for focus and perseverance as the weather gets nice and the semester hits that difficult halfway mark.

Water-Wings

As the 1 month anniversary of our arrival here in Louisville quickly approaches it is almost hard to remember what life used to be like. Moose Lake seems like an eternity away and the longing for it continues to exist. Reality sets in more and more each day that “we live here now” and that sets off a vast array of emotions. The grace that God has bestowed upon us in the last month has been amazing and we have truly been blessed in our settling in here. He has given us strength and mercy when it comes to dealing with all the change and emotions that go along with it.

But that is not to say that it has been easy. We communicated to one another last night that this is easily the hardest thing that either of us has done. The new roles that we have been placed in are so new and almost foreign that it is hard at times to know which way is up. Insecurity rears its ugly head and both Drew and I have struggled to “be real” with the people around us.  It has been difficult to navigate how/when/and where to be vulnerable and really tell people how we are doing. It is so much easier to say “we’re doing well” rather than say the things that we are really thinking and feeling. It’s not easy to be vulnerable and burden others with the reality of life, and we are often struck with feelings that no one here truly cares or wants to take the time to help us navigate this stage. However, we have been reminded through a small group that we have met with that it is only because of our pride that we are not honest with the people around us. It is our pride and selfishness that keeps us from opening up and asking for prayer, because we don’t want to appear weak.

So on that note, I ask for prayer.

We miss home, we miss the life that we knew and was “easy”, and we miss our friends and family. As life goes on for everyone back home it’s difficult to not desire to be there and be a part of it all, the good and the difficult.

We are searching for relationships. As I stated earlier it is difficult to be open and honest with the people around us, and so we are faced with the challenge of being vulnerable or being alone. Pray that we could be given opportunities to open up to those God has placed in our path.  

Please pray for our marriage relationship. God has been so gracious to us and has given us the strength to support one another. However, there are challenges and times when we struggle to keep each other afloat. I joked with Drew the other day that I wouldn’t let him drown, that I’d be his water-wings; but as we all know, we cannot always be strong and put-together. So instead I ask that you would pray that we would rely and lean on God to be our water-wings rather than each other; that He would give us the strength to persevere and we would see Him in each valley and mountain top of each day. He is good and He only gives good gifts to His children. Pray that we would remember this and glorify Him no matter what.

Finally, for us in our individual roles.

                

• As a Mom and homemaker I have the joy and blessing of being home with my beautiful children all day. I love my role and feel so blessed to be able to be with them through the highs and lows of the day. However, as any parent knows, this comes with its own specific challenges. I think I could go on for pages about every detail, but I’ll try and be concise. Ella is at a challenging age and stage to enter into a new life of community. As I stated earlier, we are blessed to live in a community with a backyard and a variety of other families to play and interact with. However, this means a lot of sharing and interactions with a variety of children of other ages. She is among the youngest of the children that she plays with and so it seems to be an adjustment for all of them to have a toddler who doesn’t always understand (or want to understand) the concept of sharing and that toys belong to other people. So as a Mom I am struggling to have patience with her as I daily try to teach her and remind her of the principles of interacting with other children. She is also exerting her independence and so listening is not always high on her priority list. Pray that I (we) can be consistent as well as patient with her as we reiterate over and over (and over!) how to be a good friend and how to be obedient to her parents as well as other authority.

                

• And for Drew in his new roles as student and painter extraordinaire. As the semester really gets going he is becoming more and more aware of the workload that each class requires. I feel (as does he!) that there is so much reading for each of his classes and so trying to balance school, work, kids, wife, friends, fun, and downtime, is a difficult thing. Pray that he could stay strong, consistent and confident, knowing that he can do this and he will succeed.  Pray that he can remember that God has called him here and He will equip him for every good work that He has ordained for him before the foundations of the earth.

On a lighter note, I have had two sessions of my Seminary Wives Institute class “Discipleship 1” with Mrs. Jane Cutrer. The class is broken into two 5-week sessions on Wednesday mornings from 10-11:45. We are reading through the book Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life by Donald Whitney. This has been a blessing of time without children, fellowship with other wives, and excellent teaching. The class has been a great reminder of the importance of the Spiritual Disciplines in my life and has been an encouragement of realistic expectations as well. Next week we get to be taught by Dr. Whitney himself!

We also had Weston’s 2-month check up last week. Our little man was 16 ½ pounds and was 25 ¼ inches! Needless to say, he was off the charts. J

Thank you so much for your prayers and your encouragement.

~Bekah

Week One: Class and Work Begin

Now that the first week of classes and work are completed I thought I'd give you a bit of an update.

Class: I have class on Tuesdays and Thursdays. At 8:30 I'm in Intro to the Old Testament 1 with Dr. James Hamilton. At 1:00 I'm in Personal Evangelism with Dr. Timothy Beougher, and at 2:30 is Systematic Theology 1 with Dr. Bruce Ware.
There was a goofy grin on my face as I walked through the halls on Tuesday. It was (is) really hard to believe that I was where I was, doing what I was doing. There was a deep sense of joy that day, but that joy was mixed with a great sense of fear. "This place could kill me", I thought several times. Yet joy was predominant.
Thursday was a bit of a different story. There was still a sense of joy, but that joy was quickly eclipsed by the fear. I've sat in rooms listening to brilliant men unfold beautiful things before. I've not given them my thoughts on theirs before. So as we talked more about specific assignments feelings of fear, doubt, intimidation, and inadequacy came rushing in. They stayed with me that day in lesser and greater degrees. The Spirit is doing His job of leading me into all truth and today has been marked by several realizations and perspective shifts to help me cope. I'm torn between wanting to leave town when the tests come due, and wanting time to hurry up already so I can get through this first semester and experience it instead of continuing in the fear of what I do not know. Such drastically contrasted desires going on inside of me!

Work: I worked Wednesday and Friday for Danny Hirby of Serious Business Painting. Wednesday had me on a site alone with a power washer preparing the external of a house for painting on Monday. Today I went to Danny's house to paint his new house. He and his wife are moving into their new home tomorrow. I plan to go with some guys from church to help them move in the morning. Danny is a really great guy and a dear brother in the Lord. I'm looking forward to working with him
It's fun putting on grubby clothes for work and not being concerned with wrinkled shirts or whether or not it's a good hair day. I do have to fight against the feelings of failure that come when you do a job that reminds you of your High School job. Oh, the good memories of Janzen's Greenhouse....
I am so thankful for this job. Danny is a great guy and just what a Sem. student needs. I think Danny and this job will continue to be a huge blessing!

Bekah is all signed up to take an SWI (Seminary Wives Institute) class on Wednesday mornings this first term. She seems excited and nervous, too. She's going to do great, and I'm excited to hear about the great things she'll learn and the friends she'll make. (Isn't it funny how easy it is to have faith for someone else?)

Please pray for us as we work through all of these wildly opposite emotions. Pray that we will continue to fight to believe the Lord is wise in calling us here. Pray that the pressure of all of these new things will make us a more godly family. We want our difficulties to make us more like Christ, instead of bitter or anxious. Keep praying for Ella, our need for good friends and our decision about church.

We love you guys, and REALLY appreciate your prayers! May God bless you as you pursue His kingdom come in our lives.

Class is in session

Classes start in the morning for me, and I thought now would be a good time to update you on what has been and seek your prayers for what, Lord willing, will be.

Two weeks ago today we set out from home for Louisville, Kentucky. There was a certain sense of sobriety mixed with fear and excitement. We said numerous times before taking this trip, "When God says 'GO', you must say, "Yes, Sir!'" Moving here was never about a need for a new exciting adventure. Bekah and I are not the most "adventurous" couple. The command of the Holy Spirit to leave what we know and to jump into what we do not know was what motivated us to leave and motivates us to stay.

We are still singing the praises of Leon, Kathi and Ike Hedberg for their great sacrifice in driving down with us and staying on several days to help us unpack and get settled in. Bekah and I nervously chuckled about how long it would have taken us to get as far as we are without their help. I'm not even trying to be funny when I guess that it would be the end of the semester before we would be able to get as far as we are at the beginning of this semester. Thank you dad, mom and brother for your great sacrifice! The time, money, emotion, thought and many other resources you poured into us and this move are stunning. I'm still having a hard time processing it all!

Stunned, shocked, and overwhelmed are good words to sum up these past two weeks (certainly more before and I'm almost certain of more to come). I've thought numerous times of the time I ran from a sauna and jumped into a freshly thawed lake up at Adventurous Christians Camp up on the Gunflint Trail. There's been work done to try and make ourselves actual citizens of Kentucky and Village Manor, but admittedly there's been a fair amount of staring at walls and boxes as we try and figure out what just happened. I remember thinking, "who moved all of my things into this strangers house!?". That gives you a feel for how we feel about "home", and partly how we feel about our entire lives here. There is so much to be thankful for and we are so grateful (though not as grateful as we know we should be) for the many evidences of God's grace to us. Yet I assume it will just take a little more time for us to adjust to this new place as home and not just another vacation spot.

As we move into the week ahead please pray that we would continue to adjust to our new home. Pray that we fight the temptation to fall into unhealthy and sinful patterns borne out of self-pity and faithless despair. Ella has been not sleeping as well lately and has been less responsive to correction and discipline. Bekah and I are both struggling to find which end is up and making progress in becoming fully here. Pray that the four of us would not be overwhelmed by the magnitude of all that is different. Pray that we would not lose hope and that we would persevere in obeying the Lord and working on the vast "to-do's". Pray that God would help me stay focused and excited for school. You know many of the personal struggles I've had and have in this particular part of this endeavor. Pray that I would continue to lean on the Lord for strength and confidence. Pray also for my family as I just now leave them home alone for an entire day. Weston is now eight weeks old and Bekah has had extra help at home every day since he was born. This is good but could be a tough adjustment for all of us! Lastly I ask that you would pray for us in the decision to join a church. We've been attending a great one the past two weekends, but we're facing what we think to be special spiritual warfare in committing. These are some particulars. Feel free to pray for obvious things I've left out.


We love you and miss you. We are so thankful for the hope we share in Christ and the promised future we have with Him and each other. Then we will know the blessed and eternal community we all long for!

Exodus 34:6-9
The LORD passed before him and proclaimed, "The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, keeping steadfast love for thousands, and forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, but who will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the father on the children and the children's children, to the third and fourth generation." And Moses quickly bowed his head toward the earth and worshiped. And he said, "If now I have found favor in your sight, O Lord, please let the Lord go in the midst of us, for it is a stiff-necked people, and pardon our iniquity and our sin, and take us for your inheritance."